{"title":"Best Sellers","description":"\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eApparently, we're not the only ones with issues.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWelcome to the \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eBest Sellers Collection\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e — the home of our most-loved, most-shared, and most screenshot-worthy designs. These are the products that made strangers laugh, exes uncomfortable, and friends text, \"Girl, where did you get that?\"\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eFrom savage breakup humor and red flag warnings to petty revenge apparel and questionable life choices, this collection contains the designs our customers simply couldn't leave behind.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWhether you're healing, spiraling, thriving, or stalking his new girlfriend's social media for research purposes only, there's something here for every stage of the recovery process.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThese aren't just our best sellers.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThey're proof that trauma can, in fact, be monetized.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSo grab the fan favorites before they disappear faster than his emotional availability.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eGolden Quips™ Best Sellers\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003eBecause if you're going to make bad decisions, at least make them look good.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","products":[{"product_id":"unfiltered-unsupervised-unapologetic-canvas-tote","title":"Unfiltered Unsupervised Unapologetic Canvas Tote","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eUNFILTERED  UNSUPERVISED  UNAPOLOGETIC.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"7053\" data-end=\"7081\"\u003eCarries chaos efficiently.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"7083\" data-end=\"7222\"\u003eRoomy, durable, and emotionally unavailable in the best possible way. Built for errands, emotional baggage, and refusing to tone it down.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"7224\" data-end=\"7252\"\u003eToo much? Sounds personal.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eProduct features\u003cbr\u003e- 100% heavy-weight cotton canvas (12 oz\/yd²) for durability\u003cbr\u003e- Flat-corner construction for a slim, structured profile\u003cbr\u003e- Long self-fabric handles with reinforced stitching for comfortable carrying\u003cbr\u003e- Available in natural or black colorways; sewn-in label\u003cbr\u003e- Blank sourced from India; adult-sized, strong spun-fiber fabric\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eCare instructions\u003cbr\u003e- Do not iron directly over the printed area - print may stick to the iron.\u003cbr\u003e- Spot clean\u003cbr\u003e- Do not bleach\u003cbr\u003e- Line dry\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ctable id=\"size-guide\" style=\"min-width: 360px;\"\u003e\n\u003cthead\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"padding: 10px;\"\u003e \u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003e15\" x 16\"\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/thead\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eWidth, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e15.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eLength, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e16.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eHandle length, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e20.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEU representative\u003c\/strong\u003e: HONSON VENTURES LIMITED, gpsr@honsonventures.com, 3, Gnaftis House flat 102, Limassol, Mesa Geitonia, 4003, CY\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eProduct information\u003c\/strong\u003e: Liberty Bags OAD113, 2 year warranty in EU and Northern Ireland as per Directive 1999\/44\/EC\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWarnings, Hazard\u003c\/strong\u003e: Blank product sourced from India, For adults\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCare instructions\u003c\/strong\u003e: Spot clean, Do not bleach, Line dry, Do not iron directly over the printed area - print may stick to the iron.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Natural \/ 15\" x 16\"","offer_id":43034472251482,"sku":"15480877706266496404","price":21.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0644\/3204\/6170\/files\/15583788386027817214_2048.jpg?v=1781475672"},{"product_id":"little-dick-hunting-club-6oz-stainless-steel-hip-flask-1","title":"Little Dick Hunting Club™ Flask","description":"\u003ch2 data-section-id=\"16zxmgn\" data-start=\"1122\" data-end=\"1182\"\u003e\" You Won't Be Blown Away\"\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1183\" data-end=\"1349\"\u003eTiny flask. Petty energy. Carries 6 ounces of “I can fix him” fuel while you continue making absolutely feral dating choices. Portable, polished, and deeply concerning.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eProduct features\u003cbr\u003e- Durable 100% stainless steel construction resists rust and corrosion\u003cbr\u003e- Leak-proof lid with secure latch to prevent spills\u003cbr\u003e- Double-wall insulation keeps liquids hot or cold for hours\u003cbr\u003e- 6 oz compact size — pocket-friendly and travel-ready\u003cbr\u003e- Powder-coated finish with UV DTF printed design; hand wash only\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eCare instructions\u003cbr\u003e- Hand wash only\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ctable id=\"size-guide\" style=\"min-width: 360px;\"\u003e\n\u003cthead\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"padding: 10px;\"\u003e \u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003e6oz\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/thead\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eHeight, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e4.45\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eWidth, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e3.66\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"6oz \/ Green","offer_id":43398351061082,"sku":"12174540508020115053","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"6oz \/ Orange","offer_id":43398351093850,"sku":"73390738956703378171","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"6oz \/ Pink","offer_id":43398351126618,"sku":"10649776644076381346","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"6oz \/ Royal","offer_id":43398351159386,"sku":"18163695225083562403","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"6oz \/ Teal","offer_id":43398351192154,"sku":"44333234793000450720","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"6oz \/ White","offer_id":43398351224922,"sku":"23313593666426097435","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0644\/3204\/6170\/files\/7580519071321801931_2048.jpg?v=1781822822"},{"product_id":"little-dick-bakery-3-4-sleeve-2","title":"Little Dick Bakery 3\/4 Sleeve","description":"\u003cp data-start=\"0\" data-end=\"62\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"633\" data-end=\"663\"\u003e\"We’ll Never Make You Gag\"\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"0\" data-end=\"62\"\u003eIt looked promising, I’ll give him that. But then… nothing rose to the occasion. And somehow he still expected a five-star review? Be serious. We don’t clap for effort alone.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eProduct features\u003cbr\u003e- Tri-blend fabric (50% polyester, 25% combed ring-spun cotton, 25% rayon) for soft drape and durability\u003cbr\u003e- Lightweight material (4.3 oz\/yd²) — airy and comfortable\u003cbr\u003e- Side seams for better shape retention and structure\u003cbr\u003e- Ribbed knit collar with seam for added elasticity and fit\u003cbr\u003e- Loose-fit silhouette with sewn-in label for easy, everyday wear\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eCare instructions\u003cbr\u003e- Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F)\u003cbr\u003e- Do not bleach\u003cbr\u003e- Tumble dry: low heat\u003cbr\u003e- Iron, steam or dry: low heat\u003cbr\u003e- Do not dryclean\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ctable id=\"size-guide\" style=\"min-width: 360px;\"\u003e\n\u003cthead\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"padding: 10px;\"\u003e \u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003eXS\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003eS\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003eM\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003eL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003eXL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003e2XL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/thead\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eWidth, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e17.48\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e19.02\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e20.51\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e22.01\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e24.02\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e26.02\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eLength, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e27.24\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e28.23\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e29.25\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e30.24\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e31.26\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e32.24\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eSleeve length, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e23.43\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e24.02\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e24.61\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e25.20\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e25.79\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e26.38\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEU representative\u003c\/strong\u003e: HONSON VENTURES LIMITED, gpsr@honsonventures.com, 3, Gnaftis House flat 102, Limassol, Mesa Geitonia, 4003, CY\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eProduct information\u003c\/strong\u003e: Next Level 6051, 2 year warranty in EU and Northern Ireland as per Directive 1999\/44\/EC\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCare instructions\u003c\/strong\u003e: Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F), Do not bleach, Tumble dry: low heat, Iron, steam or dry: low heat, Do not dryclean\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Vintage Black \/ Premium Heather \/ XS","offer_id":43440878714970,"sku":"11416562460616951274","price":38.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Premium Heather \/ Vintage Black \/ S","offer_id":43440878747738,"sku":"45983409543835115882","price":38.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Premium Heather \/ Vintage Black \/ M","offer_id":43440878780506,"sku":"11578912411154006397","price":38.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Vintage Black \/ Premium Heather \/ M","offer_id":43440878813274,"sku":"25521759113947940514","price":38.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Premium Heather \/ Vintage Black \/ L","offer_id":43440878846042,"sku":"12332628243251724408","price":38.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Vintage Black \/ Premium Heather \/ L","offer_id":43440878878810,"sku":"20443307835693820662","price":38.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Premium Heather \/ Vintage Black \/ XL","offer_id":43440878911578,"sku":"38027317519810414033","price":38.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Vintage Black \/ Premium Heather \/ XL","offer_id":43440878944346,"sku":"90571521478498707156","price":38.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Premium Heather \/ Vintage Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":43440878977114,"sku":"95544715661586829743","price":38.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0644\/3204\/6170\/files\/238712505039479496_2048.jpg?v=1781552848"},{"product_id":"little-dick-logistics-racerback-tank","title":"Little Dick Logistics™ Racerback Tank","description":"\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\"We Don't Know Where To Put It\"\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003eThe official uniform of poor planning, questionable decisions, and people who somehow make simple tasks complicated. If you've ever had to explain basic instructions twice, this tank top is for you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eSome packages are just harder to handle.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e.: Made with extra light fabric (60% combed, ring-spun cotton and 40% polyester: 4 oz\/yd² (135 g\/m²)) this racerback tank is supremely lightweight and an excellent choice for the active lifestyle.\u003cbr\u003e.: The classic fit along make the tank a comfortable choice under high performance while the scooped neckline brings a sporty touch to the whole outfit.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ctable id=\"size-guide\" style=\"min-width: 360px;\"\u003e\n\u003cthead\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"padding: 10px;\"\u003e \u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003eXS\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003eS\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003eM\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003eL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003eXL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003e2XL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/thead\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eWidth, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e13.98\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e15.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e15.98\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e16.97\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e17.99\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e18.98\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eLength, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e26.97\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e27.48\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e27.95\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e28.46\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e28.98\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e29.49\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEU representative\u003c\/strong\u003e: HONSON VENTURES LIMITED, gpsr@honsonventures.com, 3, Gnaftis House flat 102, Limassol, Mesa Geitonia, 4003, CY\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eProduct information\u003c\/strong\u003e: Next Level 1533, 2 year warranty in EU and Northern Ireland as per Directive 1999\/44\/EC\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCare instructions\u003c\/strong\u003e: Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F), Do not bleach, Tumble dry: low heat, Do not iron, Do not dryclean\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"XS \/ Solid Hot Pink","offer_id":43497229779034,"sku":"28668378630822188113","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ Solid Kelly Green","offer_id":43497229811802,"sku":"25047421104735476986","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ Solid Mint","offer_id":43497229844570,"sku":"14669987129813702532","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XS \/ Solid 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White","offer_id":43497231024218,"sku":"83277063870621437525","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0644\/3204\/6170\/files\/10149724634848872442_2048.jpg?v=1781819791"},{"product_id":"little-dick-poker-club-ceramic-coffee-mug","title":"Little Dick Poker Club™ Ceramic  Mug","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\"We Are All In... Really.\"\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eA mug for risk takers, bluffers, and people who ignored every red flag because they thought they had a winning hand.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eProduct features\u003cbr\u003e- 15 oz white ceramic capacity\u003cbr\u003e- Microwave-safe for reheating beverages\u003cbr\u003e- Dishwasher-safe for easy cleaning\u003cbr\u003e- Comfortable C-handle with rounded corners\u003cbr\u003e- Lead- and BPA-free, food-safe materials\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eCare instructions\u003cbr\u003e- Clean in dishwasher or wash by hand with warm water and dish soap\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ctable id=\"size-guide\" style=\"min-width: 360px;\"\u003e\n\u003cthead\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"padding: 10px;\"\u003e \u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003e15oz\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/thead\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eHeight, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e4.72\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eDiameter, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e3.39\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eDiameter (with handle), in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e4.92\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEU representative\u003c\/strong\u003e: HONSON VENTURES LIMITED, gpsr@honsonventures.com, 3, Gnaftis House flat 102, Limassol, Mesa Geitonia, 4003, CY\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eProduct information\u003c\/strong\u003e: Generic brand, 2 year warranty in EU and Northern Ireland as per Directive 1999\/44\/EC\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCare instructions\u003c\/strong\u003e: Clean in dishwasher or wash by hand with warm water and dish soap\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"15oz","offer_id":43497277489242,"sku":"52516259574674444061","price":20.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0644\/3204\/6170\/files\/2969508872188725592_2048.jpg?v=1781819611"},{"product_id":"little-dick-electric-co-™-flask","title":"Little Dick Electric Co.™ Flask","description":"\u003ch3\u003e\"You Won't Feel A Spark.\"\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003eSome connections just aren't there.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003eThe Little Dick Electric Co.™ Flask celebrates every relationship that had all the excitement of waiting on hold with customer service. Perfect for women who finally admitted there wasn't any chemistry, despite his repeated claims otherwise.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003eAt least this flask can hold something stronger than his personality.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eProduct features\u003cbr\u003e- 6 oz stainless steel capacity — compact and pocket-ready\u003cbr\u003e- Double-wall insulation for temperature retention\u003cbr\u003e- Leak-proof screw lid with attached hinge for secure transport\u003cbr\u003e- Durable powder-coated finish \u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eCare instructions\u003cbr\u003e- Hand wash only\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ctable id=\"size-guide\" style=\"min-width: 360px;\"\u003e\n\u003cthead\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"padding: 10px;\"\u003e \u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003e6oz\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/thead\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eHeight, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e4.45\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eWidth, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e3.66\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEU representative\u003c\/strong\u003e: HONSON VENTURES LIMITED, gpsr@honsonventures.com, 3, Gnaftis House flat 102, Limassol, Mesa Geitonia, 4003, CY\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eProduct information\u003c\/strong\u003e: Polar Camel, 2 year warranty in EU and Northern Ireland as per Directive 1999\/44\/EC\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCare instructions\u003c\/strong\u003e: Hand wash only\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"6oz \/ Green","offer_id":43519853297754,"sku":"61901046221506772558","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"6oz \/ Orange","offer_id":43519853330522,"sku":"35478440045705665455","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"6oz \/ Pink","offer_id":43519853363290,"sku":"30658773416976649464","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"6oz \/ Royal","offer_id":43519853396058,"sku":"13655759658952712934","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"6oz \/ Teal","offer_id":43519853428826,"sku":"10346467087757066407","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"6oz \/ White","offer_id":43519853461594,"sku":"15663292438987186071","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0644\/3204\/6170\/files\/9685020641094173309_2048.jpg?v=1781815677"},{"product_id":"little-dick-accounting™-trucker-hat","title":"Little Dick Accounting™ Trucker Hat","description":"\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\"We Always Come Up Short.\"\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe official hat of over-promising and under-delivering. Perfect for anyone whose biggest asset is confidence and whose biggest liability is reality.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eProduct features\u003cbr\u003e- High-profile 5-panel structured foam front with seamless lining\u003cbr\u003e- Breathable mesh back and adjustable plastic snap for a custom fit\u003cbr\u003e- Thick, laminated 100% polyester fabric with matching undervisor and braid\u003cbr\u003e- Pre-curved visor with 8 rows of stitching for durable shape retention\u003cbr\u003e- One size fits most — sturdy construction meant to hold its look over time\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eCare instructions\u003cbr\u003e- Use warm water and dish soap and clean spots off your hat. It's not necessary to soak the whole item. For hard to clean spots use a soft bristled brush.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEU representative\u003c\/strong\u003e: HONSON VENTURES LIMITED, gpsr@honsonventures.com, 3, Gnaftis House flat 102, Limassol, Mesa Geitonia, 4003, CY\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eProduct information\u003c\/strong\u003e: OTTO Cap 39-165, 2 year warranty in EU and Northern Ireland as per Directive 1999\/44\/EC\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCare instructions\u003c\/strong\u003e: Use warm water and dish soap and clean spots off your hat. It's not necessary to soak the whole item. For hard to clean spots use a soft bristled brush.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ One size","offer_id":43519875317850,"sku":"13259299226493561045","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ One size","offer_id":43519875350618,"sku":"30288097808098924752","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Dark Navy \/ One size","offer_id":43519875383386,"sku":"28654416696791902777","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Royal \/ White \/ Royal \/ One size","offer_id":43519875416154,"sku":"85002668157955354656","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ White \/ Navy \/ One size","offer_id":43519875448922,"sku":"19359681664716277724","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Hot Pink\/ White\/ Hot Pink \/ One size","offer_id":43519875481690,"sku":"30048090854648441762","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0644\/3204\/6170\/files\/756067376567863841_2048.jpg?v=1781816381"},{"product_id":"little-dick-marketing™-wine-tumbler","title":"Little Dick Marketing™ Wine Tumbler","description":"\u003ch3\u003e\"We'll Make You Think We're A Big Deal\"\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHis confidence was impressive. The evidence supporting it was not.They say wine is the secret to a long, happy life. This custom wine tumbler helps you enjoy your favorite wines at the perfect temperature and can now accommodate your personal designs. Its double-insulated walls help retain your drinks soothingly hot or refreshingly cold, while the stainless steel, stemless design makes for incredible durability and ease of use.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e.: Material: 18\/8 food grade stainless steel \u003cbr\u003e.: One size: 12oz (0.35 l)\u003cbr\u003e.: Seamless vacuum-insulated double-wall construction\u003cbr\u003e.: Clear, BPA-free press-on lid with slide closure\u003cbr\u003e.: Keeps liquids cold for 12 hours \u0026amp; hot for 6 hours\u003cbr\u003e.: Hand wash only\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ctable id=\"size-guide\" style=\"min-width: 360px;\"\u003e\n\u003cthead\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"padding: 10px;\"\u003e \u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003e12oz\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/thead\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eHeight, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e4.50\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eRim diameter, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e3.11\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eBase diameter, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e2.75\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEU representative\u003c\/strong\u003e: HONSON VENTURES LIMITED, gpsr@honsonventures.com, 3, Gnaftis House flat 102, Limassol, Mesa Geitonia, 4003, CY\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eProduct information\u003c\/strong\u003e: Generic brand, 2 year warranty in EU and Northern Ireland as per Directive 1999\/44\/EC\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWarnings, Hazard\u003c\/strong\u003e: Blank product sourced from China, For adults\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCare instructions\u003c\/strong\u003e: Hand wash only\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"White \/ 12oz","offer_id":43519962415194,"sku":"11359122231484701546","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Steel \/ 12oz","offer_id":43519962447962,"sku":"50340536775458846191","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0644\/3204\/6170\/files\/4686780834414084530_2048.jpg?v=1781818764"},{"product_id":"little-dick-logistics™-boxer-briefs","title":"Little Dick Logistics™ Boxer Briefs","description":"\u003ch3\u003e\"We Don't Know Where To Put It\"\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003eFor the ex who couldn't find the dishwasher, a trash can, emotional maturity, or basic accountability.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNow that's a shipping problem.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eProduct features\u003cbr\u003e- 100% polyester with soft two-sided fleece finish for a gentle, smooth feel\u003cbr\u003e- Elastic, soft waistband for all-day comfortable support\u003cbr\u003e- Extra light fabric (3.8 oz\/yd² \/ 129 g\/m²) for breathable wear\u003cbr\u003e- Regular fit with printed care label inside\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eCare instructions\u003cbr\u003e- Do not dryclean\u003cbr\u003e- Do not iron\u003cbr\u003e- Dry flat\u003cbr\u003e- Do not bleach\u003cbr\u003e- Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ctable id=\"size-guide\" style=\"min-width: 360px;\"\u003e\n\u003cthead\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"padding: 10px;\"\u003e \u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003eXS\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003eS\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003eM\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003eL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003eXL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003e2XL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003e3XL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/thead\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eWaist, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e12.99\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e13.78\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e14.57\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e15.35\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e16.14\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e16.93\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e17.72\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eLength, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e12.20\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e12.60\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e12.99\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e13.39\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e13.78\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e14.17\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e14.57\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"XS \/ Black stitching","offer_id":43520002293850,"sku":"27899431938249987271","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Black stitching","offer_id":43520002326618,"sku":"15826539901312165148","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black stitching","offer_id":43520002359386,"sku":"91209376967104184562","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black stitching","offer_id":43520002392154,"sku":"18355784739108309582","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black stitching","offer_id":43520002424922,"sku":"21390157437532010553","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black stitching","offer_id":43520002457690,"sku":"31073925441507674208","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Black stitching","offer_id":43520002490458,"sku":"13162755195214800789","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0644\/3204\/6170\/files\/7015070999184585596_2048.jpg?v=1781820759"},{"product_id":"your-mom-should-have-swallowed","title":"Your Mom Should Have Swallowed Tee","description":"\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSome people are walking reminders that every decision has consequences.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThis tee says what everyone else is thinking but doesn't have the nerve to say. Perfect for family gatherings, awkward reunions, and running into your ex's newest mistake.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSoft. Comfortable. Questionably appropriate.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWear responsibly. Or don't.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eProduct features\u003cbr\u003e- 100% Airlume combed ring-spun cotton for a soft, breathable feel\u003cbr\u003e- Retail fit with crew neckline — tidy, easy to layer\u003cbr\u003e- Ribbed knit collar, shoulder tape, and side seams for shape retention\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eCare instructions\u003cbr\u003e- Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F)\u003cbr\u003e- Non-chlorine: bleach as needed\u003cbr\u003e- Tumble dry: low heat\u003cbr\u003e- Iron, steam or dry: medium heat\u003cbr\u003e- Do not dryclean\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ctable id=\"size-guide\" style=\"min-width: 360px;\"\u003e\n\u003cthead\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"padding: 10px;\"\u003e \u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003eXS\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003eS\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003eM\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003eL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003eXL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003e2XL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003e3XL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003e4XL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/thead\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eWidth, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e16.50\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e18.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e20.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e22.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e24.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e26.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e28.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e30.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eLength, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e27.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e28.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e29.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e30.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e31.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e32.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e33.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e34.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eSleeve length, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e8.60\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e8.90\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e9.20\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e9.50\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e9.70\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e10.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e10.40\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e10.80\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eSize tolerance, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e1.50\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e1.50\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e1.50\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e1.50\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e1.50\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e1.50\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e1.50\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e1.50\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eProduct information: \u003c\/strong\u003eBella+Canvas 3001, 2 year warranty in EU and Northern Ireland as per Directive 1999\/44\/EC\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWarnings, Hazard: \u003c\/strong\u003eFor adults, Blank product sourced from Honduras\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCare instructions: \u003c\/strong\u003eMachine wash: cold (max 30C or 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Is This Organic? Canvas Tote Bag","description":"\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003eYou survived boxed wine, mystery corks, and whatever was sitting on the gas station shelf next to the beef jerky.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003eNow someone hands you an \u003cem\u003eorganic, biodynamic, sustainably harvested, hand-whispered\u003c\/em\u003e bottle and suddenly you're supposed to have standards?\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003eThis tote is for the people who appreciated a good screw top bottle of wine in a strangers field... and now can joke about it. Whether you're hauling groceries, farmers market finds, books you'll never finish, or enough snacks to emotionally support an entire road trip, this bag carries everything... including your questionable life choices.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePerfect For:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-spread=\"false\"\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eWine lovers with an unfiltered sense of humor\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eFarmers markets (ironically or seriously)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eGrocery runs\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eGirls' trips \u0026amp; winery weekends\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eEveryday errands with maximum sarcasm\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eThe friend who's just a little too honest\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eCarry your essentials. Leave the wine snobbery at home.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eProduct features\u003cbr\u003e- 100% heavy-duty 12 oz cotton canvas for long-lasting use\u003cbr\u003e- Flat-corner construction for a slim, foldable profile\u003cbr\u003e- Reinforced self-fabric handles for comfortable carrying\u003cbr\u003e- Sewn-in label; made from blank stock sourced in India\u003cbr\u003e- Available in natural or black colorways\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eCare instructions\u003cbr\u003e- Do not iron directly over the printed area - print may stick to the iron.\u003cbr\u003e- Spot clean\u003cbr\u003e- Do not bleach\u003cbr\u003e- Line dry\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ctable id=\"size-guide\" style=\"min-width: 360px;\"\u003e\n\u003cthead\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"padding: 10px;\"\u003e \u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003e15\" x 16\"\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/thead\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eWidth, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e15.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eLength, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e16.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eHandle length, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e20.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Natural \/ 15\" x 16\"","offer_id":43668192854106,"sku":"22780524500232078448","price":21.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 15\" x 16\"","offer_id":43668192886874,"sku":"10527099697283340842","price":21.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0644\/3204\/6170\/files\/8674283319128061100_2048.jpg?v=1784265503"}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0644\/3204\/6170\/collections\/8723864039278789931_2048.jpg?v=1782259108","url":"https:\/\/goldenquipsapparel.com\/collections\/featured.oembed?page=2","provider":"Golden Quips","version":"1.0","type":"link"}